The Fifth Marauder

mrssnuffles

warning: grey's anatomy spoilers ahead! 

Cristina, I could promise to hold you, and to cherish you. I could promise to be there, in sickness and in health. I could say 'til death do us part, but I won't. Those vows are for optimistic couples, the ones full of hope. I do not stand here on my wedding day optimistic or full of hope. I am not optimistic, I am not. I am sure. I am steady. And I know I am a heart man, take them apart, put them back together. I hold them in my hands. I am a heart man. So this, I am sure. You are my partner, my lover, my very best friend. My heart, my heart, beats for you. And on this day, the day of our wedding, I promise you this. I promise you to lay my heart in the palm of your hands. I promise you, me. - Dr. Preston Burke, Grey's Anatomy season 3 episode 25

just saw the season finale of grey's anatomy. and though i had quite a few teary-eyed moments, i still liked last season's finale more, even if denny duquette ended up dying anyway after all that has happened.

izzie, despite all her flaws is my favorite character in the series. and although i liked her during her fling with alex, i wanted her to end up with george upon seeing the third episode of the first season. i'm so sorry for saying this but i think callie is just the rebound girl. she suddenly appears after meredith ditches george, and he marries her after his dad dies. maybe izzie is the girl for him even if she is way too pretty and hot for him. and can i just say that how bloody good sandra oh is in what she does? i never did like christina yang's character (eventhough she has the best lines next to dr bailey), but tears just couldn't help but form in the corners of my eyes everytime she strays away from her ice queen/queen bitch persona and cries like that.

****

i wish i had my cousin's determination. she got home around 2 am last night, had too much to drink that she had to crawl on her hands and knees so that she could go throw up in the bathroom and back, and was up until 5 am because her head won't stop spinning, yet she is now in her room doing tae bo. after a night like that i would usually just stare off into space the whole day while lying down, refusing to move at all except for meals and to go to the toilet. even now when i am well and on vacation i still am too lazy to drag my ass to the gym or something. hay.

mrssnuffles

hay tama na muna ang drama.

skip the next paragraph if you are a boy or someone who has a weak stomach for ob-gyne stories.

i went to the ob-gyne earlier this morning. i've been feeling a little something something out of the ordinary um, down there (obviously kaya nga sa ob ako pumunta di ba?) for a week now. it was a funny experience. it was like i have forgotten two years of nursing education and i was reduced to being a giggly catholic-schooled teenage girl. when the ob was asking me why i was there, i kept on saying the word ano in lieu of vagina. or puerta, as she finally said after the few times of me saying the word ano. and when she finally said that word, i giggled. i friggin giggled. and i think i was a bit defensive when i told the ob that i am not sexually active and have never had any sexual experiences. because i mentioned that tidbit even before she asked me. hehe. so after the interview, the part that i was dreading finally came. the inspection. they asked me to take off my jeans and underwear and lie down on the bed. i was giggling the whole time. nakakainis. i seemed to have remembered what i have learned so far in nursing at that point, because when the ob asked me to spread 'em (hehe), i immediately sat back up and asked whether she was using a vaginal speculum (it's that metal thing that looks like a bird's beak that spreads the folds open so they can take a better look) on me, and maybe just maybe she could just warm it first with her hands because that thing is just cold! it turns out she didn't need to use it anyway because she said i am still a virgin. yay. i don't know if i was just nervous or something, but i think i said ouch and aray and ow quite a few times when she was inspecting me. and i think she lacerated something because it hurts now when i pee.

anyway, ang ganda ng friends! finally masusundan ko na rin ang love story ni ross and rachel, mula nung umpisa pa! feeling ko hindi ko siya matatapos until start ng school. waaah.

i'm bored. hindi ako puwede ma-bore. kasi pag na-bore ako, tutunganga ako at iisipin ko ang mga bagay na dapat naman ay hindi iniisip.

mrssnuffles

ngayon ko lang na-realize na nasa bohol or cebu or wherever na kayong lahat ng mga ganitong oras. haha loser naiwan ako dito sa mainit at maduming maynila

moving on, i just wanna say how much i admire those girls out there who know what they want and exactly how to get it. in those teeny bopper shows, the supporting cast are always telling the main characters to "tell him/her how you feel" and 8 out of the 10 times that they heed this advice, the other party feels the same way. kaya nga tv show eh di ba. i said 8 out of 10 because if the said show is a series, then the main characters will not end up together at first, even after the aminan part. hehe. how i wish i can do that in real life. it would really save a lot of time and effort on my part. it's either i'm scared or just plain stubborn. oh well. a friend told me to do pretty much the same thing but in a different context, but i won't. i know i'm torturing myself by letting things be unexplained, but i still won't ask the question. i can't. i just can't. it's funny because i  talk too much ( a little too much sometimes i know) most of the time, but when it comes to stuff like this, i am happy with just keeping my mouth shut. i wonder why?

where has my vacation gone? a friend texted me earlier that we actually have orientation on the 12th and 13th, which is about 3 days from now. waaaaaaah!!! i am not yet done with the friends dvds!  

am feeling a little lonely. i want new kikay stuff, even if i've got stuff to last me for about 2 years. hehe. actually the loneliness will be gone in a few minutes when i talk to my dad regarding my new laptop. i just wanted new stuff. hehe.

mrssnuffles

Why are we human beings such suckers for pain?
If we think, feel, and believe that we don't deserve such a downfall,
why take the fall in the first place?
If the signs of turmoil are already there,
why do we insist on taking the downward spiral still?
And why do we insist on holding onto something
that can never be worth it?

- from a multiply friend's blog entry

i'm a girl who apparently has too much time on her hands. but that's all going to change come tuesday, when classes start. i bet on my next entry i will be complaining about not having enough time to blog. hehe.

mrssnuffles

amazing. i just spent the whole day in front of my computer. it's already 10:30 pm and i didn't even realize it.

finally, i was able to watch the heroes season 1 finale. i love this show! i love you peter petrelli! kahit duguan na siya and all, ang hot pa rin niya! although last night i had a dream about this guy who looked like a mohinder-sylar hybrid, and he's asking me to come with him to the laundry room because he had no clean clothes left. uy. hehe. sayang i woke up before we got to the laundry room, pero in fairness ang ganda ng gising ko

i decided to watch ugly betty after heroes. i wanted to watch something that is not med-related as i am going back to that hell on earth i call school/hospital tomorrow. actually the hospital is not so bad, i just hate school. i hate the fact that we have lecture. again. argh.  so anyway, after the first episode, biglang nagloko yung net. ayun ayaw na mag load nung 2nd episode. waaaah.

hay ayoko pa pumasok bukas. gusto ko pa dito sa bahay. madami pa kong puwedeng panoorin. hindi ko pa nga tapos ung veronika decides to die eh. 

pinagttripan ako ng itunes ko. naka-shuffle mode kasi ako. leche ka. haha 

mrssnuffles

hay finally! i haven't opened my pc for the past three days because i have been coming home late and usually too tired to wait for my ancient kakarag-karag laptop to finish loading so i could go online. and now that i finally have the time, i suddenly find out that the power cord's busted again for the nth time. i'm using my cousin's macbook right now (yay! hehe). i haven't had the chance to continue with the laptop hunting because i've been having communication problems with the parents (which i will not go into detail right now because remembering it will just ruin my night, so the new laptop plans are still on hold for the meantime. which really sucks because i was so looking forward to it.

anyway my first week back in school was interesting. tuesday we were supposed to have an orientation for our national center for mental health rotation, but that was cancelled so we ended up watching silip at sm jologs (aka sucat) instead. i wanted to watch ocean's 13 and wouldn't care less if i was alone, but they wouldn't let me. wednesday was orientation day as well as my dinner/coffee date with the toot-toot girls in greenbelt. thursday, one of our friends just had her capping ceremony earlier that day so she invited us over for dinner and don luis brandy with coke. hehe. friday i had classes from 8am to 11. i would have gone home after my class has ended but ace and i ended up in the library the rest of the afternoon because it was too hot to go home. and then today i had the same sked. i wanted to go home after my 11 am class but we ran into elai and tess on our way home. so i ended up having lunch with them in sm jologs, and then they dragged me off to prov tower (yes the one near dlsu) because of the videoke rooms. grabe, eh meron naman sa sm southmall come to think of it. hehe. anyway, we then went back to school to look up our duty skeds for monday (waaaaaah).

i think i have been sleep deprived since tuesday. been having troubles sleeping again, which i am hoping will go away by monday. hay.

i was planning on watching some friends episodes on the macbook but i think i'm going to bed instead. i'm tired. and sleepy.  

haha it amazes me how shallow i can be sometimes. major pogi points were deducted this day because i hated the shoes that he had on. and it's funny because i seem to mind this more than the times that he called me by any other name aside from my own.

mrssnuffles

haha pinagtatawanan ko na ang sarili ko ngayon. wala lang para talaga ako gago kahapon.

hay antok na ko. katamad pumasok bukas.  

mrssnuffles

sa friends! i actually borrowed the dibidis two weeks ago, but the addiction has only sunk in yesterday. i was actually late for my 9:30 am class because i refused to leave the house at the middle of an episode. we had a quiz for the said 9:30 am class, and it's a really good thing that my seatmate is so smart or else i would have gotten a zero. haha. and then today, my class ended at 1 pm, and during saturdays we usually do not go home early. it's like we have this unwritten rule that we have to go somewhere or do something after our classes. they were all surprised when i said that i was going home. it was as if they couldn't believe their ears. haha. sorry guys. it was like the meteor garden craze all over again. haha. well this is a good sign, that i am now willing to ditch my friends to watch friends (hehe) at home. it means that i am becoming a hermit again. and this is good because being a hermit is cheap. and it also means that i can actually resist the idea of spending more time with him now. yay. i'm tired of thinking about him. and writing about him in my blog. and it does not really help that we are together like 6 days a week. 

mrssnuffles

i miss my computer. i miss my bookmarks, i miss my touchpad that is not as sticky as the one in this laptop that i am using. i miss my mp3s, my pictures. i wish i could finally decide on what to do with my laptop situation. i think i acted a bit too bratty and arrogant the last time i discussed the matter with one of my titas.

anyway, i haven't been my cheerful self lately. well except when i am watching friends. it does not take that much to put me in a bad mood. i am too lazy (well more than usual anyway if that is even possible hehe) to do schoolwork, even something as simple as transferring and organizing my notes. or just plain showing up on time for class. argh. kill me now.

looking on the brightside though, tomorrow is a free day as well as tuesday. yay. so that's two whole days with my new best friends chandler, monica, phoebe, joey, rachel, and ross! hehehe. can i just say how kilig i am over chandler and monica's "secrecy"?

oh wow look at the time! it's already 8:30 and so far i have read  paragraph from my anatomy book and zero notes transferred. hahahaha. i think i need a nice solid motivation for doing this.  i always tell my friends i have a knack for remembering useless information, and this said information is usually something i really like and care about, like the surgical procedures in grey's anatomy for example. but i've been trying to like what i am doing right now for about 2 and a half years already..

i just saw a pinoy rendition of and i'm telling you i'm not going on youtube. the said rendition was sung  by kyla, sheryn, sarah, and regine. sakit ng ulo ko. ayaw nilang sumigaw. even kyla, who's not that much of a screamer was forced to make birit along with the other three birit queens. sakit talaga sa ulo.

my friend just texted me, and apparently we have an 8 am class tomorrow. argh. kill me now.  

mrssnuffles

For you I'd give a lifetime of stability
Anything you want of me, nothing is impossible
For you there are no words or ways to show my love
Or all the thoughts I'm thinking of
Cause this life is no good alone
Since we've become one I've made a change
Everything I do now makes sense, all roads end
All I do is for you

For you I share the cup of love that overflows
And anyone who knows us knows
That I would change all faults I have
For you there is no low or high or in-between
Of my heart that you haven't seen
Cause I share all I have and am
Nothing I've said's hard to understand
And all I feel I feel deeper still and always will
All this love is for you

Every note that I play, every word I might say
Every melody I feel
Are only for you and your appeal
Every page that I write, everyday of my life
Would not be filled without the things
That my love for you now brings

For you I'd make a promise of fidelity, now and for eternity
No one could replace this vow
For you I'd take your hand and heart and everything
And add to them a wedding ring
Cause this life is no good alone
Since we've become one you're all I know
If this feeling should leave I'd die, and here's why
All I am is for you

Everything I do now makes sense, all roads end
All I do....
Is for you
Only for you

i love this song! i've loved this ever since i first heard it back in college (haha i'm still in college i know but what the heck, masteral ko na tong nursing! walang kokontra!!! haha), when my cousin reg and i would listen to the sunday slowdown program in magic 899. i forgot about this song for quite a while when i got distracted by all the other songs in my ipod, but i rekindled my love for it when one boring day at moa, while waiting for the repair guy to be finished with tess' fone, my friends elai and ace decided to listen to this song on repeat. this song brings out the girl in my friend elai. and she's soooo not. a girl, if you know what i mean hehe. basta. hehe.